Golden Girl
We all know that the Spanish love a winner, whatever the sport, and that point was underlined at the recent European Swimming Championships in Eindhoven. No, I didn’t know it was on either. Catalan synchronised swimmer, Gemma Mengual, picked up the Gold medals first in her individual performances and then later in the pairs and teams, to be proclaimed the queen of the championships. Not even the Russians who have dominated the sport of late can claim a haul of four golds. Needless to say, the Spanish press went bananas, devoting pages to the new Golden Girl, and predicting success at the Olympics in Beijing later in the year. But let’s be honest, anything that you have to put makeup on for isn’t a sport. Otherwise we’ll be watching team lap dancing at the Olympics in London in 2012. Now THERE’s a thought…
Drugs in Real Estate Shock!
Bong! A new report from the United States Department of State claims that black money from drug trafficking in Spain has been feeding the Spanish real estate boom along the coast. The ‘2008 International Narcotics Control Strategy Report’ dedicates a whole chapter to Spain where it claims that there are local town halls that have preferred to ignore the origin of the money. It claims that given the high profitability of the construction sector over recent years, many coastal municipalities have turned their backs on the illegality of construction projects in their towns. They note that the Prosecutor’s Office has acted in the face of this reality and note that in Málaga province alone, more than 200 cases of corruption linked to construction have been investigated.
The report calculates that up to 30% of the 500€ notes in circulation in Europe can be found in Spain, linked directly to the purchase of property for money laundering purposes. It describes Spain as the ‘grand European centre for money laundering’, as well as the grand door for the entry of illegal narcotics.
The report also describes Spain as being the leading country for the use of illegal drugs in Europe, and says that one in five cocaine users in Europe lives in Spain where 3% of the population take the drug on a regular basis. Most of the 500€ mentioned, by the way, were found rolled up in the toilets in Marbella nightclubs.
All the nice boys love a sailor.com
A man serving at the Rota naval base in Cádiz faces two months military arrest for using a military email to place an advertisement on an internet dating site.
‘Tall, dark attractive man, tender, horny, athletic and well-endowed’, was the wording used, and it has upset the Spanish Ministry for Defence. It’s not the advert, which boasts ‘If you try me once, you’ll become an addict’ lack of which has upset the authorities; but rather the fact that the mde.es military internet domain has been used.
All the members of the Spanish armed forces have an email address, and while the regulations say officially that email should not be used for personal uses, it’s a regulation that has never been effectively enforced. However the current case has drawn attention to the matter. El País quoted one military source as saying ‘Advertising a second hand car is not the same as placing a pornographic ad’. Then again “Great for getting around town, one careful lady owner” has been used a few times to describe myself….
Cage aux follies!
A Nicolas Cage impersonator was treated like a star as he watched Real Madrid play AS Roma in a recent Champions League match. Paolo Calabresi, an Italian TV presenter, watched the match with Madrid president Ramon Calderon from his box at the Santiago Bernabeu stadium. “The truth is I was a little scared they would find me out, but from the first moment everyone was friendly with me,” Calabresi told Marca newspaper. “We knew there would be many repercussions. My phone won’t stop ringing.”
Videos posted on Spanish media websites showed Calabresi, whose English has an Italian accent, being presented with a personalised Nicolas Cage team jersey from Calderon. Calabresi also met and posed for photographs with Madrid forward Robinho. I can’t work out how he wasn’t rumbled as the 43-year-old Rome native bears about as much resemblance to the actor, who won the best actor Oscar for “Leaving Las Vegas” in 1996, as I do to Brad Pitt. Brad Pitbull more like.
You can never be too careful
A Murcia shopkeeper was somewhat surprised to say the least to see in a receipt for payments as a self-employed worker that the Social Security authority had included an additional charge – 1.32 € to cover the risk of falling pregnant. Not only is the shopkeeper in question over the age of 60, but he is also a man.
Juan Solano says it is the first problem he has encountered in all his 39 years of paying into the system, and jokingly commented to La Opinión de Murcia that at the age of 63, even if he were a woman, he would no longer be fertile. He’s not much of a looker either.
Choc Horror!
So, another Holy Week came and went with the usual media circus surrounding Antonio Banderas in Malaga (and as this was the first Semana Santa since his father died, I’m sure he just wanted to be left alone) as well as the weather forcing some parades to be cancelled, and the accompanying pictures of the devoted in tears because they couldn’t give their Virgin the annual trip round the block. In addition to this, the hotel industry were up in arms, complaining that this was the worst Semana Santa in 10 years. Rafael Prado, President of Aehma, the business association for the sector in Malaga province, told Europa Press that what is normally the second most important date of the year in the provincial capital – behind the August feria and ahead of Christmas – was marked by an evident lack of money. He said there were very few foreign tourists, and spoke of the need for better organisation to sell Semana Santa to the tourists, not only in its capital but also in major towns such as Marbella, Vélez Málaga and Antequera. Well. I hate to bring this up, but over at Mosca Mansions, we’ve always associated Easter with a trip to the coast, cracking open a couple of beers and enjoying the sunshine. Why they decided to move the Easter Bunny to Mad as a March Hare time is anyone’s guess. Is there no understanding about the true meaning of Easter? I mean, I’d only just finished off my Valentine’s chocolates, before it was time to unwrap the Cadbury’s Cream Eggs!
